Crash Course in Marriage

Below are my notes to sermon entitled, "How to affair Proof Your Marriage." Enjoy.
-Danny.

The Ideal Marriage?
Women get married expecting their husbands to change...
Men get married expecting their wives never to change...

Man's Expectations of Marriage:
· His House is clean, Belly is full, Loins are empty.
· His wife will always have perfect hair, perfect makeup, and the perfect attitude.
· Of course, she will always be "In the Mood" no matter what kind of day she has had.
· The wife always keeps the home fires burning so that when the man comes home from work, playing golf or softball, fishing or hunting, or just hanging out with the guys...everything is in order and he can prop his feet up, sit back and rest in peace until his wife brings him his four course meal on a tv tray so he can watch his favorite team on television.

Woman's Ideal Marriage:
· Her husband will always be ready to talk.
· He will always write her love letters and poems and bring her flowers.
· He will always want to watch the children during ladies day out.
· He will always remember her birthday, anniversary, Valentine's day.
· The husband wants to spend all of his free time going on long walks, or snuggled up on the couch, giving her massages, telling her how beautiful she is.
· He will always consider her opinion before he makes any decisions.
· He will always say, "anything for you" and "go ahead, buy whatever makes you happy".
· He will always be gentle, soft spoken and considerate.
· He will always be in the mood to "Just Cuddle".

Men: Want their wives to be impressed with them.
Women: Want their husbands to cherish them.

Top Secret Information:
· Men secretly want you to see them as your hero.
· Women want you to see them as a princess. (Special and important)

*Men want to be: Women want to be:
Appreciated Appreciated
Admired Cherished
Respected Protected
Honored Treasured
Hero Lady

To feel loved you have to feel appreciated and cared for.
Love is not a Feeling.
Love is an Action.
Love is a Choice.

What happens to love after the wedding?
· Before you are married...you think the one you love is perfect because you are "In Love".
· No matter what problems come our way we can make it through because we are "In Love".
· The "In Love" experience typically last only about 2 years. (According to a study by Dr. Dorothy Tennov)
· Eventually we descend from the clouds and put our feet on the earth again.
· Once the exuberance and excitement wear off...we find ourselves wondering what happened. The things that once were cute, now annoy and irritate us.
· The little things that we could overlook because we were "In Love" now have become huge mountains.
· Welcome to the real world of marriage...where there is always hairs on the sink, little things now matter profoundly, like the position of the toilet seat, who takes out the trash, etc...
· What happened to the "In Love" experience? It leaves.
· The "In Love" experience is designed to get you started down the road to relationship. But it is impossible to maintain things at that level for very long or your world would fall apart.
· The "In Love" experience is not a mature love that lasts.
· Love that is a decision lasts.

*How to affair proof your marriage...
1. Eliminate the competition.
2. Steak vs. Bologney.
3. If your full...steak is unappealing.
4. If your starving...bologney looks like steak.
5. The secret is...keep your spouse full and you'll avoid alot of bologney.
Small portions of this blog post are from the book 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman